Discomfort plays a crucial role in our growth. Despite its negative connotations, avoiding discomfort can lead to significant problems in our lives. Often, our fear of discomfort is much worse than the discomfort itself. We avoid discomfort because we are afraid of them, and they get built up in our mind to something greater than they actually are.
One of the primary issues with discomfort is that avoiding it leads to stagnation. Growth usually requires us to step outside our comfort zone– accepting new challenges, practicing vulnerability, being authentic can all be uncomfortable. When we shy away from discomfort, we miss these growth opportunities. Learning a new skill often involves discomfort– we feel incompetent, get frustrated, and want to give up. When we are able to persist through that discomfort, we improve and eventually reach mastery. Similarly, adapting to changes or overcoming personal fears is often filled with discomfort– but as we adapt to changes, we increase our capacity for adaptation. As we overcome our fears, we grow.
In the professional realm, discomfort is often associated with taking on new responsibilities, tackling complex problems, or pursuing career advancements. Avoiding discomfort in these scenarios hinders career growth and limits professional development. Embracing discomfort can lead to acquiring new competencies, increased resilience, and greater adaptability—qualities highly valued in the workplace. Sometimes, our careers stagnate because we are unwilling to have uncomfortable conversations.
Avoiding discomfort can also negatively impact our mental health and resilience. When we consistently choose comfort over challenge, we fail to build the coping mechanisms needed to handle stress and adversity. This can result in increased anxiety, lower self-esteem, and a reduced ability to manage life’s inevitable challenges. Facing discomfort head-on helps us build mental fortitude and resilience. When we constantly run from discomfort, we have little ability to tolerate it, and we develop fear and avoidance of anything that is uncomfortable.
Discomfort often arises in interpersonal relationships, whether through difficult conversations, setting boundaries, or addressing conflicts. Avoiding these uncomfortable situations can lead to unresolved issues, misunderstandings, and deteriorating relationships. Embracing discomfort in relationships encourages open communication, trust, and deeper connections.
Creativity and innovation thrive in environments where we are willing to take risks and explore the unknown—activities inherently linked with discomfort. But if we are afraid of discomfort and avoid it, we stifle our creative potential and hinder our ability to innovate. Embracing discomfort allows us to push boundaries, think outside the box, and generate novel solutions to problems.
Understanding that discomfort is a natural and necessary part of growth is the first step in overcoming the fear of it.
Avoiding discomfort is impossible. Life inherently involves discomfort. When we allow our fear of discomfort to grow, we avoid engaging in the difficult parts of life. This has a couple of ironic effects: our problems grow larger, which means the discomfort to fix them also increases, and we avoid the meaningful parts of life that allow us to grow. Instead, we stagnate, and stagnation is… not comfortable.
So, how can we embrace discomfort, rather than running from it?
- Reframe Discomfort: View discomfort as an opportunity for growth rather than a negative experience. Recognize that it is a sign of progress and personal development. When we feel uncomfortable, we can intentionally remind ourselves that its ok, and that this is part of growth and learning.
- Set Incremental Goals: Break down challenging tasks into smaller, manageable steps. This makes discomfort more bearable and the overall goal more achievable.
- Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself when facing discomfort. Acknowledge your efforts and celebrate small victories along the way. Acknowledging discomfort is practicing honesty– not weakness.
- Be Uncomfortable Together: Discomfort is more bearable when it is shared with others. Even when having a difficult conversation with someone, we can share that it is uncomfortable. This is not something that has to be carried privately. Also, surrounding yourself with people who are also growth-oriented helps prevent stagnation.
- Reflect on Past Experiences: Recall instances where facing discomfort led to positive outcomes. Use these memories as motivation to tackle new challenges, and allow these experiences to help you retrain yourself to not fear the discomfort.
Lastly, remember that discomfort will pass, and then it will return. It is a part of life. Embrace it– and see what happens.
Cheers,
Doc